Horoscopes

Capricorn​​ Dec 22 – Jan 19 This is your month! You’ve spent the last 11 months waiting for it, you have every right to order what you want and NOT feel obligated to share your large fry. Because as your sign sigil the Goat implies, you are the Greatest Of All Time!


Aquarius​​ Jan 20 – Feb 18 There’s going to be a lot of fires this month that people will need your help putting out… Thank the stars for the water sign! Use your excellent sense of tact and grace this month to avoid any pitfalls in your personal life, and be prepared to mediate.


Pisces ​​Feb 19 – Mar 20 No one seems to like a critic, but everyone loves to read the reviews; don’t stop being you. People are going to talk no matter what, so why not give them something to talk about? As the saying goes, “no publicity is bad publicity”.


Aries​​ Mar 21 – Apr 19 Aries, we get it, you’re not afraid to try new things. But sooner or later you will find yourself eating alone. Step back a bit; let others have a say. Being headstrong definitely has its virtues, but it is only through self-discipline that we can allow our talents to truly flourish.


Taurus​​ Apr 20 – May 20 It’s a new year, Taurus, the time to let go of the past and allow new beginnings flourish. Don’t get your rocky mountain oysters in a bind; change is inevitable and can bring some sweet to your saltiness. Embrace the change and go with the flow. After all, “change is the only constant.”


Gemini​​ May 21 – Jun 20 You are that special spice everyone is looking for this month, and your ability to adapt makes you fit for any meal. You’re going to be in high demand, and you deserve to let loose a little. Let others take control, and see where it takes you. Don’t be afraid of trying something new. Cancer​​ Jun 21 – Jul 20 Some people love to eat crab; others think it’s just too much work with not enough reward. Don’t waste your energy pinching at those people – focus on those who not only want you around, but go out of their way to have you.


Leo ​​Jul 23 – Aug 22 Take pride in your ability to take care of yourself and those you hold dear. You don’t simply get food – you hunt for it, and there are many animals out there looking to eat your leftovers. Let them; it’s what keeps you on top.


Virgo​​ Aug 23 – Sep 22 You’re like gas station sushi. I know you’re bad for me, but sometimes I just can’t help myself. WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME, VIRGO????


Libra​​ Sep 23 – Oct 22 You are anyone’s sweet tooth fulfillment, Libra; you make it difficult to take just one bite. The “new year, new me” season is upon you, and you’re tired of the same-old-same-old. Everyone wants a piece – don’t even think about settling for less. Even if Virgo is out there looking like a snack.


Scorpio​​ Oct 23 – Nov 21 You’re on fire, Scorpio, and rightly so. There is a passion stirring deep within you that wants to get out, so bring closure to any areas of your life that are holding you back and get down to the nitty gritty once and for all. You know what you have to do – now go do it!


Sagittarius​​ Nov 22 – Dec 21 Your soul is hangry, Sag – you’ve waited until the point of starvation to get up to eat. You’re not finding satisfaction in the same things anymore, and maybe it’s because you’ve outgrown them. Take some time to get in touch with what is going to really feed your soul, and stop being so hard on yourself. You’ve come a long way